Georgia aka George aka Georgie was a rescue cat that came from a very tough life before we entered into her life. It was quickly made known that we were going to be her hospice home as Georgie had all kinds of health issues that were not going to keep her on this world much longer. It is a year to this day that my partner and I made the decision to free Georgie from her quickly declining condition, after we had about eight beautiful months to be the guardians of this very magical being.
In honor of the 12 months that have passed since Georgie left this world, I wanted to share 12 of the lessons that I learned from her on life and relationships. She was tiny, but mighty with wisdom. I love you so much, George.
Lesson #1: Be clear, compassionate, and direct with your boundaries
From day one of adopting George, we knew exactly what she was needing and wanting to be loved in the ways that felt good for her. Even when it came to taking the medication that she (understandably) was not wanting to take, she allowed me to administer them to her in a way that still met the goal of taking the medication and also worked within her boundaries. George would slowly leave a room (like the sweet, old kitty that she was) that was not conducive to what she was wanting, instead of trying to force the environment to change around her through controlling others. The vet’s office absolutely adored George and we would get the report back from the staff that they loved how clear George was with her boundaries and it allowed for them to have such a connective relationship with her. Clear boundaries create that clear channel of connection.
Lesson #2: Let the people who love you support you
George needed a lot of support and assistance with her medical conditions. There was medication to be had, vet appointments to be made, bathroom challenges to be addressed, and hair that needed to be brushed. I thought of the hospice situations with family members that I had witnessed that had such similar, vulnerable needs from others, and I so admired George’s trust in myself and my partner to be her guardians in such a tender phase of life. There were plenty of moments where we could see how hard it was for Georgie to allow us to support her because of the vulnerability and potential for embarrassment that even animals are very in touch with, and still, she trusted in our unconditional love for her and let us support her. I will forever hold her in my heart as my inspiration to do my very best to allow the same from those who love me.
Lesson #3: Have a grounding anchor to ride the storms of life
For George, her grounding anchor was her heating pad. This was her security blanket and the item that she could come home to after long vet visits to gain her sense of grounding and regulation. It does not need to be anything extravagant, just something that can help ease your worries and your pains that arise in the challenges that life will bring. Even better if a loving friend gifts it to you.
Lesson #4: Always bring curiosity
Georgie did not have much energy on a daily basis, and definitely was something that we watched decline over the months, but still there was this undying fire of curiosity in her. She would come over to explore new items that had been placed on the ground or come to inspect (and properly assess) a rearrangement of a room. On warmer nights, I would take her outside to explore a small area in the front and would watch as she listened to the sounds of the distant city life and look about the trees and shrubs of the neighbor’s. Always just a pure sense of curiosity that she carried, ready to receive the next wonder that life would offer to her.
Lesson #5: Treats are still possible to taste even with the bitterness of life present
Little George had to take a few medications a couple times a day, and sometimes more depending on what was going on. This included pills and injections of liquid medication into her mouth, which judging by her reaction at first, was a terrible tasting substance. I started to do a strategy with George’s favorite treat to help her with the bitter taste of the medicine and this had her stop walking away when she saw me bringing over the medication. She was not super stoked about it, but she was more accepting and trusting that even when there was something that tasted like rotten lemons in her experience of life, still she could find the sweetness of a treat. The complexity of being a creature on this Earth.
Lesson #6: Lay in the afternoon sun, if even for a moment
There were so many simple pleasures that I saw her enjoy, but this was one that brought a different kind of energy of pleasure from her. My partner created a little perch for George by one of the windows where she could bask in the afternoon sun and look out into the world to fill her curiosity even more. We would also catch George by the front door that had window panes because at just the right time, it was the perfect spot to receive the warmth of that big heating pad in the sky. Whether by a window or a spot out in the park, take a moment to just sit down, close your eyes, and feel the simple nourishment of the afternoon sun.
Lesson #7: You are never too old to play
This could also be never too sick to play. What does it even mean to you to “play”? We have our different ideas in our minds of what that might look like or what qualifies as play, but this can also just be a way of being in the world. Georgie was totally game to play with her ribbon toy, or to just play a altered version of hot hands, or hot patas in her case. Even just her way of being curious brought in elements of play despite her being an old, very sick kitty. She was not some spry, young kitten, but definitely kept the spirit of one.
Lesson #8: Sometimes the best kind of support is just presence and listening
I am and will always be eternally grateful for the support that George provided to me in the time that we had together. I called her my little homie, and she was just that. She took on the role of being that support when I was going through a tough time or having a really hard day. I remember a handful of instances where she would come and find me crying in another room, announce her arrival with a little “merr”, and simply come sit next to me. That’s all I needed - the companionship and presence of a being who loved me - and Georgie was the perfect example of how to offer that to others.
Lesson #9: Cartoons…make sure they are part of your life
My partner and I are big fans of cartoons and have been all of our lives. Georgie’s love of cartoons was only more confirmation that we were a good fit. It doesn’t necessarily need to be cartoons (highly suggest it), but having something that you can turn to for some simple joy goes a long way. And to be able to share something with your family, whether chosen or biological, creates a bonding ritual in itself. George’s top picks are Avatar: The Last Airbender, The Owl House, Over The Garden Wall, and Adventure Time. Truly, my little homie.
Lesson #10: Food is great, but sharing food with friends is even better
One of my favorite videos I have of George is her munching down on a piece of popcorn that she was given by my partner. Georgie was never pushy with getting food from us even with the smell of meat and fish wafting in the air. She would come over, sit with us, receive her offering, and just be in the simple moment of having a meal or snack together. Again, such a simple moment of our days that be made that much more meaningful when we add in that element of connection.
Lesson #11: Life is better when cuddles are involved
Whether this looks like cuddling up with someone you love at night, or cuddling up with friends to watch some cartoons, or even cuddling up to do a morning meditation - this was something that Georgie did well at. And she did so in an empowered way that still honored her boundaries, while also honoring her desire for connection and physical affection. This created even more meaningfulness in that physical connection and what a beautiful offering of co-regulation when needed.
Lesson #12: You are always enough and valuable and make a difference simply by existing and being you
There is no amount of time or specific criteria that is required for you to make a difference in someone’s life. My time with George was the shortest amount of time that I ever had with an animal companion and one of the most profound. She was in a very tender phase of life, and so was I in my own way. Georgie did not need to be some energized, healthy kitty to bring value and make a difference. She existed and was her genuine sassy self and that is what made such an impact for me, my partner, and everyone who met her. Georgie was always enough because she existed, just as you and I are always enough because we exist too. No need to make it any more complicated than that.
Our animal friends offer us so much wisdom, and perhaps these lessons from George are reminders to you on lessons that you have gained from the wonderful creatures that have been in you life. Regardless, thank you for taking a moment to learn from my dear, little homie by reading through this post.
I love you always, Georgie.
I love you and I miss you, Georgie.